You Know It’s Hot In Texas When:

• You can say 110 degrees without fainting.
• You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.
• The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a bit chilly.
• You discover that in August, it takes only two fingers to drive your car.
• You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.

• You know the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
• You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
• You realize asphalt has a liquid state.
• The birds have to use pot holders to pull worms out of the ground.
• You no longer associate bridges with water.
• Your perspiration smells like bacon frying.
• A funeral procession stops at Dairy Queen.
• The deer feeder has pop corn in it.
• You have fried green tomatoes on your vine.
• Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.
• When the lizards are wearing sandals to cross the roads.
• You’re sweating like a poodle at Michael Vick’s house.
• Squirrels are fanning their nuts.
• You see a dog chasing a cat and they’re BOTH walking.
• Water in public swimming pools is evaporating so fast that children are being encouraged to swim in the deep end and keep ignoring the "no peeing" rule.
• Jehovah's Witnesses start telemarketing!!

JACK wants to know your “hot” weather observations. Got any?